Daily Diary, November 27, 2022

Last night, I’m going to sleep, chose to meditate instead, focusing on, I am who am
I was conscious through most of the night
dream state did arise, and it seemed like I passed right from consciousness, to  the dream state and back to consciousness twice before finally getting up at 2 AM in the soaking sweats.
Lay down to sleep at 2 AM and fell into unconscious sleep from 2 to 5.
Meditation at six to about seven in the morning very difficult honey mind and I am who I am for the first half hour 45 minutes but I got easier a little bit after that and added an extra five or 10 minutes to the meditation at the end.
Told Rebecca about the practice and shared the who am I essay with her and instructions for practice.
Round about 12:40 I tried meditating and found it much easier to stay focused on the feeling – sense of I going to who I am and I can catch it and come back to I.
Thoughts arising is  very subtle and happens very quickly in the mind and I often can’t catch myself before I’m a few thoughts in an a whole little “Microverse” gets created, and I pull myself back with and then bring it back to mwho I am and I.
The way thoughts seem to jump from the sense of I into almost the middle of his whole slew of thoughts, and microverses remind me very much of the movie Inception, especially when he was first talking to the girl who’s going to be the architect and asks her:”how do we get here you don’t remember you’re just suddenly there and this entire microverse is created in the mind complete and whole. And then disappears as quickly.
It does make it tougher to pull back and catch it quickly and come back into who am I and back into  I am.
I never noticed how I thought stream starts. I’m just in the middle of the thought stream and it’s ongoing.
Describe the experience and realization to Rebecca and offered her the who am ISAN instructions for practice give her fair warnings and she is willing and wants to go forward.
Who knows maybe her big brother will turn her onto something which will allow all the pure joy, happiness, compassion, and love, that is a true nature of all of us to shine through the clouds of her mind.

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